1
00:00:01,217 --> 00:00:05,210
If a photon is directed through a plane
with two slits in it and either is observed...
2
00:00:05,388 --> 00:00:07,913
...it will not go through both.
If unobserved, it will.
3
00:00:08,091 --> 00:00:11,322
If it's observed after it left the plane,
before it hits its target...
4
00:00:11,494 --> 00:00:14,327
...it will not have gone through both slits.
- Agreed.
5
00:00:14,497 --> 00:00:15,623
What's your point?
6
00:00:15,799 --> 00:00:18,768
There's no point,
I just think it's a good idea for a T-shirt.
7
00:00:24,307 --> 00:00:26,935
- Excuse me.
- Hang on.
8
00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:33,340
One across is Aegean,
eight down is Nabokov.
9
00:00:33,516 --> 00:00:36,007
Twenty-six across is MCM.
10
00:00:36,186 --> 00:00:37,244
Fourteen down is...
11
00:00:37,420 --> 00:00:39,251
Move your finger.
12
00:00:39,422 --> 00:00:42,255
- Phylum, which makes 14 across
Port-au-Prince.
13
00:00:43,693 --> 00:00:47,686
See, Papa Doc's capital idea,
that's Port-au-Prince.
14
00:00:48,398 --> 00:00:49,956
Haiti.
15
00:00:50,867 --> 00:00:52,266
- Can I help you?
- Yes.
16
00:00:54,604 --> 00:00:59,268
Um, is this the high-IQ sperm bank?
17
00:01:00,176 --> 00:01:03,111
If you have to ask,
maybe you shouldn't be here.
18
00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,275
I think this is the place.
19
00:01:07,117 --> 00:01:08,448
- Fill these out.
- Thank you.
20
00:01:08,618 --> 00:01:10,779
- We'll be right back.
- Oh, take your time.
21
00:01:10,954 --> 00:01:13,616
I'll just finish my crossword puzzle.
22
00:01:14,224 --> 00:01:16,454
Oh, wait.
23
00:01:26,669 --> 00:01:28,796
Leonard, I don't think I can do this.
24
00:01:28,972 --> 00:01:31,600
What, are you kidding? You're a semipro.
25
00:01:32,242 --> 00:01:34,540
No. We are committing genetic fraud.
26
00:01:34,711 --> 00:01:37,908
There's no guarantee our sperm's
going to generate high-IQ offspring.
27
00:01:38,081 --> 00:01:39,105
Think about that.
28
00:01:39,282 --> 00:01:43,582
I have a sister with the same basic DNA mix
who hostesses at Fuddruckers.
29
00:01:44,220 --> 00:01:45,881
Sheldon, this was your idea.
30
00:01:46,055 --> 00:01:49,252
A little extra money to get
fractional T1 bandwidth in the apartment?
31
00:01:49,425 --> 00:01:52,758
I know.
And I do yearn for faster downloads.
32
00:01:53,329 --> 00:01:56,298
There's some poor woman
who's gonna pin her hopes on my sperm.
33
00:01:56,466 --> 00:01:59,458
What if she winds up with a toddler
who doesn't know if he should use...
34
00:01:59,636 --> 00:02:03,128
...a differential to solve for the area
under a curve?
35
00:02:03,706 --> 00:02:06,869
- I'm sure she'll still love him.
- I wouldn't.
36
00:02:08,444 --> 00:02:10,071
Well, what do you wanna do?
37
00:02:10,246 --> 00:02:12,680
- I want to leave.
- Okay.
38
00:02:12,849 --> 00:02:15,044
- What's the protocol for leaving?
- I don't know.
39
00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:18,346
I've never reneged
on a proffer of sperm before.
40
00:02:19,289 --> 00:02:20,722
Let's try just walking out.
41
00:02:21,591 --> 00:02:22,785
Okay.
42
00:02:32,902 --> 00:02:33,926
- Bye.
- Bye-bye.
43
00:02:34,103 --> 00:02:35,536
Nice meeting you.
44
00:02:38,074 --> 00:02:41,510
- Are you still mad about the sperm bank?
- No.
45
00:02:42,312 --> 00:02:45,440
You wanna hear an interesting thing
about stairs?
46
00:02:45,615 --> 00:02:47,014
Not really.
47
00:02:47,183 --> 00:02:50,175
If the height of a step is off
by as little as two millimeters...
48
00:02:50,353 --> 00:02:53,516
...most people will trip.
- I don't care.
49
00:02:54,357 --> 00:02:56,188
Two millime...? That doesn't seem right.
50
00:02:56,359 --> 00:02:58,884
It's true.
I did a series of experiments when I was 12.
51
00:02:59,062 --> 00:03:00,791
My father broke his clavicle.
52
00:03:01,798 --> 00:03:03,857
Is that why they sent you
to boarding school?
53
00:03:04,033 --> 00:03:06,729
No. That was the result
of my work with lasers.
54
00:03:12,876 --> 00:03:13,934
New neighbor?
55
00:03:14,110 --> 00:03:15,338
Evidently.
56
00:03:15,511 --> 00:03:18,674
Significant improvement
over the old neighbor.
57
00:03:19,048 --> 00:03:22,643
Two-hundred pound transvestite
with a skin condition? Yes, she is.
58
00:03:24,587 --> 00:03:25,747
Oh, hi.
59
00:03:25,922 --> 00:03:26,946
- Hi.
- Hi.
60
00:03:27,123 --> 00:03:28,647
- Hi.
- Hi.
61
00:03:29,692 --> 00:03:31,284
Hi?
62
00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:34,123
We don't mean to interrupt.
We live across the hall.
63
00:03:34,297 --> 00:03:35,696
Oh, that's nice.
64
00:03:36,733 --> 00:03:39,201
No. We don't live together. I mean...
65
00:03:39,369 --> 00:03:44,534
...we live together, but in separate,
heterosexual bedrooms.
66
00:03:45,108 --> 00:03:47,201
Okay, well, guess I'm your new neighbor.
67
00:03:47,377 --> 00:03:49,504
- Penny.
- Leonard. Sheldon.
68
00:03:49,679 --> 00:03:51,306
- Hi.
- Hi.
69
00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:53,210
Hi.
70
00:03:54,651 --> 00:03:56,175
Well...
71
00:03:56,552 --> 00:03:58,042
Oh, welcome to the building.
72
00:03:58,221 --> 00:04:00,553
Oh, thank you.
Maybe we can have coffee sometime.
73
00:04:00,723 --> 00:04:01,781
- Oh, great.
- Great.
74
00:04:01,958 --> 00:04:03,653
- Great.
- Great.
75
00:04:05,461 --> 00:04:06,826
Well, bye.
76
00:04:06,996 --> 00:04:08,964
- Bye.
- Bye.
77
00:04:11,601 --> 00:04:13,330
Should we have invited her for lunch?
78
00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:16,529
No. We're gonna start season two
of Battlestar Galactica.
79
00:04:17,206 --> 00:04:19,333
We already watched
the season two DVDs.
80
00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:21,136
Not with commentary.
81
00:04:23,212 --> 00:04:24,907
I think we should be good neighbors.
82
00:04:25,081 --> 00:04:26,912
Invite her over, make her feel welcome.
83
00:04:27,550 --> 00:04:30,747
We never invited Louie/Louise over.
84
00:04:31,287 --> 00:04:33,221
Well, and that was wrong of us.
85
00:04:33,389 --> 00:04:34,720
We need to widen our circle.
86
00:04:34,891 --> 00:04:37,917
I have a very wide circle.
87
00:04:38,094 --> 00:04:41,188
I have 212 friends on MySpace.
88
00:04:42,031 --> 00:04:44,556
Yes, and you've never met one of them.
89
00:04:44,968 --> 00:04:46,526
That's the beauty of it.
90
00:04:48,838 --> 00:04:50,772
I'm gonna invite her over.
91
00:04:50,940 --> 00:04:53,670
We'll have a nice meal and chat.
92
00:04:53,843 --> 00:04:57,210
Chat? We don't chat,
at least not off-line.
93
00:04:58,781 --> 00:04:59,941
Well, it's not difficult.
94
00:05:00,116 --> 00:05:01,743
You just listen to what she says...
95
00:05:01,918 --> 00:05:05,547
...and then you say something appropriate
in response.
96
00:05:06,456 --> 00:05:08,014
To what end?
97
00:05:09,058 --> 00:05:11,219
- Hi. Again.
- Hi.
98
00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:13,692
- Hi.
- Hi.
99
00:05:13,863 --> 00:05:15,387
Anyway...
100
00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:18,625
...we brought home Indian food...
101
00:05:19,535 --> 00:05:21,594
...and I know that
moving can be stressful...
102
00:05:21,771 --> 00:05:23,966
...and I find
that when I'm undergoing stress...
103
00:05:24,140 --> 00:05:27,439
...that good food
and company can have a comforting effect.
104
00:05:28,578 --> 00:05:32,446
Also, curry's a natural laxative and
I don't have to tell you that, you know...
105
00:05:32,615 --> 00:05:36,984
...a clean colon is just one less thing
to worry about.
106
00:05:38,321 --> 00:05:41,017
I'm no expert,
but in the context of a lunch invitation...
107
00:05:41,190 --> 00:05:43,818
...you might wanna skip the reference
to bowel movements.
108
00:05:44,327 --> 00:05:46,158
Oh, you're inviting me over to eat?
109
00:05:47,230 --> 00:05:48,254
Yes.
110
00:05:48,431 --> 00:05:50,490
Oh, that's so nice. I'd love to.
111
00:05:50,666 --> 00:05:51,690
Great.
112
00:05:51,868 --> 00:05:54,166
So, what do you guys do for fun
around here?
113
00:05:54,804 --> 00:05:56,795
Well, today we tried masturbating
for money.
114
00:06:24,834 --> 00:06:26,734
- Okay, well, make yourself at home.
- Okay.
115
00:06:26,903 --> 00:06:30,339
- Thank you.
- You're very welcome.
116
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,174
You're very welcome.
117
00:06:33,676 --> 00:06:36,474
This looks like some serious stuff.
Leonard, did you do this?
118
00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:39,046
Actually, that's my work.
119
00:06:39,615 --> 00:06:40,604
Wow.
120
00:06:40,783 --> 00:06:43,183
Yeah, well, it's just some
quantum mechanics...
121
00:06:43,352 --> 00:06:47,186
...with a little string theory doodling
around the edges. That part's just a joke.
122
00:06:47,356 --> 00:06:50,587
It's a spoof of the Born-Oppenheimer
approximation.
123
00:06:51,494 --> 00:06:54,986
So you're, like, one of those
Beautiful Mind genius guys.
124
00:06:56,065 --> 00:06:57,589
Yeah.
125
00:06:58,601 --> 00:06:59,829
This is really impressive.
126
00:07:00,002 --> 00:07:03,267
I have a board, if you like boards.
This is my board.
127
00:07:04,006 --> 00:07:05,371
Holy smokes.
128
00:07:05,541 --> 00:07:08,840
If by "holy smokes," you mean
a derivative restatement of the stuff...
129
00:07:09,011 --> 00:07:12,378
...you can find scribbled on the wall
of any men's room at MIT, sure.
130
00:07:12,982 --> 00:07:14,381
- What?
- Oh, come on.
131
00:07:14,550 --> 00:07:18,179
Who hasn't seen this differential below
"here I sit brokenhearted"?
132
00:07:18,354 --> 00:07:22,381
At least I didn't have to invent 26
dimensions just to make the math come out.
133
00:07:22,558 --> 00:07:25,322
- I didn't invent them. They're there.
- In what universe?
134
00:07:25,495 --> 00:07:27,292
In all of them, that is the point.
135
00:07:28,397 --> 00:07:30,126
Do you guys mind if I start?
136
00:07:30,299 --> 00:07:31,926
- Penny.
- Yeah?
137
00:07:32,101 --> 00:07:34,228
That's where I sit.
138
00:07:35,138 --> 00:07:36,901
So sit next to me.
139
00:07:38,341 --> 00:07:42,368
- No, I sit there.
- What's the difference?
140
00:07:42,545 --> 00:07:45,105
- What's the difference?
- Here we go.
141
00:07:45,281 --> 00:07:48,512
In winter, that seat is close enough
to the radiator to remain warm...
142
00:07:48,684 --> 00:07:50,879
...yet not so close
as to cause perspiration.
143
00:07:51,053 --> 00:07:55,251
In the summer, it's in a cross breeze created
by opening windows there and there.
144
00:07:55,424 --> 00:07:59,520
It faces the television at an angle that is
neither direct, discouraging conversation...
145
00:07:59,695 --> 00:08:02,163
...nor so far wide
as to create a parallax distortion.
146
00:08:02,331 --> 00:08:06,392
I could go on,
but I think I've made my point.
147
00:08:08,704 --> 00:08:10,035
Do you want me to move?
148
00:08:10,206 --> 00:08:12,037
- Well...
- Just sit somewhere else.
149
00:08:14,410 --> 00:08:15,900
Fine.
150
00:08:33,629 --> 00:08:35,756
Sheldon, sit.
151
00:08:36,966 --> 00:08:38,331
Ah.
152
00:08:40,203 --> 00:08:43,468
- Well, this is nice.
- We don't have a lot of company over.
153
00:08:43,639 --> 00:08:46,199
That's not true.
Koothrappali and Wolowitz come over.
154
00:08:46,375 --> 00:08:47,364
Yes, I know.
155
00:08:47,543 --> 00:08:49,943
Tuesday night we played Klingon Boggle
until 1 in the morning.
156
00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:52,637
- Yeah, I remember.
- I resent you saying we don't have company.
157
00:08:52,815 --> 00:08:55,579
- That has a negative social implication.
- I said I'm sorry.
158
00:08:56,886 --> 00:08:58,046
So...
159
00:08:58,221 --> 00:08:59,586
...Klingon Boggle?
160
00:08:59,755 --> 00:09:04,317
Yeah. It's like regular Boggle,
but in Klingon.
161
00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:09,663
That's probably enough about us.
So tell us about you.
162
00:09:10,566 --> 00:09:12,124
Me? Okay.
163
00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:15,896
I'm a Sagittarius, which probably tells you
way more than you need to know.
164
00:09:16,072 --> 00:09:19,508
Yes, it tells us that you participate
in the mass cultural delusion...
165
00:09:19,675 --> 00:09:22,735
...that the sun's position relative
to arbitrary constellations...
166
00:09:22,912 --> 00:09:26,177
...at the time of your birth
somehow affects your personality.
167
00:09:28,517 --> 00:09:30,144
Participate in the what?
168
00:09:30,319 --> 00:09:32,150
I think what Sheldon's trying to say...
169
00:09:32,321 --> 00:09:35,051
...is that Sagittarius wouldn't have been
our first guess.
170
00:09:35,224 --> 00:09:37,920
Oh, yeah, a lot of people
think I'm a water sign.
171
00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:40,424
Okay, let's see, what else?
172
00:09:40,596 --> 00:09:41,620
Oh, I'm a vegetarian.
173
00:09:41,797 --> 00:09:45,858
No, except for fish,
and the occasional steak. I love steak.
174
00:09:47,436 --> 00:09:48,903
Well, that's interesting.
175
00:09:49,071 --> 00:09:50,663
Leonard can't process corn.
176
00:09:55,511 --> 00:09:57,103
So do you have some sort of a job?
177
00:09:57,280 --> 00:09:58,304
Oh, yeah.
178
00:09:58,481 --> 00:10:00,472
I'm a waitress
at The Cheesecake Factory.
179
00:10:01,183 --> 00:10:02,445
I love cheesecake.
180
00:10:02,618 --> 00:10:05,985
- You're lactose intolerant.
- I don't eat it, I think it's a good idea.
181
00:10:07,556 --> 00:10:09,387
Anyways, I'm also writing a screenplay.
182
00:10:09,558 --> 00:10:12,994
It's about this sensitive girl who comes
to L.A. From Lincoln, Nebraska...
183
00:10:13,162 --> 00:10:17,360
...to be an actress and winds up
a waitress at The Cheesecake Factory.
184
00:10:17,967 --> 00:10:19,662
So it's based on your life.
185
00:10:19,835 --> 00:10:21,826
No, I'm from Omaha.
186
00:10:25,408 --> 00:10:27,399
If that was a movie, I would go see it.
187
00:10:27,576 --> 00:10:28,770
I know, right?
188
00:10:28,944 --> 00:10:30,673
Okay, let's see, what else?
189
00:10:32,148 --> 00:10:33,843
I guess that's about it.
190
00:10:34,417 --> 00:10:36,647
That's the story of Penny.
191
00:10:37,219 --> 00:10:38,811
Well, it sounds wonderful.
192
00:10:39,922 --> 00:10:41,355
It was.
193
00:10:41,524 --> 00:10:45,016
Until I fell in love with a jerk.
194
00:10:48,164 --> 00:10:49,529
What is happening?
195
00:10:49,699 --> 00:10:51,690
I don't know.
196
00:10:51,867 --> 00:10:54,097
Oh, God, you know,
four years I lived with him.
197
00:10:54,270 --> 00:10:57,433
Four years.
That's like as long as high school.
198
00:10:57,606 --> 00:11:00,097
It took you four years
to get through high school?
199
00:11:02,044 --> 00:11:05,844
I just... I can't believe I trusted him.
200
00:11:09,819 --> 00:11:12,344
Should I say something?
I feel I should say something.
201
00:11:12,521 --> 00:11:14,148
You? No, you'll only make it worse.
202
00:11:14,323 --> 00:11:16,518
You wanna know the most pathetic part?
203
00:11:16,692 --> 00:11:20,219
Even though I hate his lying,
cheating guts...
204
00:11:20,396 --> 00:11:22,830
...I still love him.
205
00:11:22,998 --> 00:11:24,056
Is that crazy?
206
00:11:24,233 --> 00:11:25,894
Yes.
207
00:11:27,303 --> 00:11:30,602
No, it's not crazy. It's a...
208
00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:32,468
It's a paradox.
209
00:11:32,641 --> 00:11:36,008
Paradoxes are part of nature.
I mean, think about light.
210
00:11:36,178 --> 00:11:40,774
If you look at Huygens, light is a wave,
as confirmed by the double-slit experiments.
211
00:11:40,950 --> 00:11:43,282
But then, along comes Albert Einstein...
212
00:11:43,452 --> 00:11:46,421
...and discovers that light
behaves like particles too.
213
00:11:49,058 --> 00:11:51,583
Well, I didn't make it worse.
214
00:11:52,895 --> 00:11:54,556
Oh, I'm so sorry I'm such a mess.
215
00:11:54,730 --> 00:11:57,426
And on top of everything else,
I'm all gross from moving...
216
00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:59,329
...and my stupid shower doesn't work.
217
00:11:59,502 --> 00:12:01,663
Our shower works.
218
00:12:02,271 --> 00:12:04,501
Really? Would it be totally weird
if I used it?
219
00:12:04,673 --> 00:12:05,697
- Yes.
- No.
220
00:12:05,875 --> 00:12:06,899
- No?
- No.
221
00:12:07,076 --> 00:12:08,304
No.
222
00:12:08,711 --> 00:12:10,110
It's right down the hall.
223
00:12:10,279 --> 00:12:11,473
Okay, thanks.
224
00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:13,239
You guys are really sweet.
225
00:12:19,722 --> 00:12:22,589
Well, this is an interesting development.
226
00:12:25,294 --> 00:12:26,318
How so?
227
00:12:26,495 --> 00:12:27,826
It has been some time...
228
00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:30,864
...since we've had a woman
take her clothes off in our apartment.
229
00:12:31,033 --> 00:12:33,024
That's not true.
Remember at Thanksgiving...
230
00:12:33,202 --> 00:12:36,262
...my grandmother with Alzheimer's
had that episode?
231
00:12:37,473 --> 00:12:41,273
Point taken. It has been some time since
we've had a woman take her clothes off...
232
00:12:41,444 --> 00:12:44,106
...after which
we didn't wanna rip our eyes out.
233
00:12:45,014 --> 00:12:48,506
The worst part
was watching her carve that turkey.
234
00:12:48,951 --> 00:12:52,717
So, what exactly
are you trying to accomplish here?
235
00:12:52,888 --> 00:12:54,014
Excuse me?
236
00:12:54,190 --> 00:12:56,784
That woman in there
is not going to have sex with you.
237
00:12:56,959 --> 00:12:58,950
Well, I'm not trying to have sex with her.
238
00:12:59,128 --> 00:13:01,824
Oh, good.
Then you won't be disappointed.
239
00:13:01,997 --> 00:13:04,329
What makes you think
she wouldn't have sex with me?
240
00:13:04,500 --> 00:13:06,468
I'm a male and she's a female.
241
00:13:06,969 --> 00:13:10,063
Yes, but not of the same species.
242
00:13:10,239 --> 00:13:12,332
I'm not gonna engage
in hypotheticals here.
243
00:13:12,508 --> 00:13:16,205
- I'm just trying to be a good neighbor.
- Oh, of course.
244
00:13:16,378 --> 00:13:19,438
That's not to say that
if a carnal relationship were to develop...
245
00:13:19,615 --> 00:13:22,106
...that I wouldn't participate.
246
00:13:23,419 --> 00:13:24,886
However briefly.
247
00:13:26,121 --> 00:13:28,385
Do you think this possibility
will be hindered...
248
00:13:28,557 --> 00:13:32,425
...when she discovers your Luke Skywalker
"no more tears" shampoo?
249
00:13:33,162 --> 00:13:35,630
It's Darth Vader shampoo.
250
00:13:37,032 --> 00:13:39,398
Luke Skywalker's the conditioner.
251
00:13:41,303 --> 00:13:43,828
- Wait till you see this.
- It's fantastic. Unbelievable.
252
00:13:44,006 --> 00:13:45,098
See what?
253
00:13:46,308 --> 00:13:50,540
It's a Stephen Hawking lecture from MIT
in 1974.
254
00:13:50,713 --> 00:13:51,907
This isn't a good time.
255
00:13:52,081 --> 00:13:54,208
It's before he became...
256
00:13:54,383 --> 00:13:56,214
...a creepy computer voice.
257
00:13:58,220 --> 00:14:00,085
- That's great, you guys have to go.
- Why?
258
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:03,248
- It's just not a good time.
- Leonard has a lady over.
259
00:14:03,792 --> 00:14:06,693
Yeah, right.
Your grandmother back in town?
260
00:14:08,497 --> 00:14:09,521
No.
261
00:14:09,698 --> 00:14:12,189
And she's not a lady,
she's just a new neighbor.
262
00:14:12,368 --> 00:14:15,098
Hang on, there really is a lady here?
263
00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:16,738
- Uh-huh.
- And you want us out...
264
00:14:16,906 --> 00:14:18,931
...because you're anticipating coitus?
265
00:14:19,508 --> 00:14:22,306
- I'm not anticipating coitus.
- So she's available for coitus?
266
00:14:22,478 --> 00:14:24,946
Can we please just stop saying "coitus"?
267
00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:27,742
Technically,
that would be coitus interruptus.
268
00:14:28,551 --> 00:14:31,577
Hey, is there a trick
to getting it to switch from tub to shower?
269
00:14:31,754 --> 00:14:33,551
Oh, hi, sorry.
270
00:14:33,722 --> 00:14:35,053
Hello.
271
00:14:36,392 --> 00:14:38,622
Enchanté, mademoiselle.
272
00:14:40,329 --> 00:14:43,423
Howard Wolowitz,
CalTech Department of Applied Physics.
273
00:14:43,599 --> 00:14:45,464
You may be familiar
with some of my work.
274
00:14:45,634 --> 00:14:48,102
It's currently orbiting
Jupiter's largest moon...
275
00:14:48,270 --> 00:14:51,103
...taking high-resolution
digital photographs.
276
00:14:51,907 --> 00:14:54,808
Penny. I work at
The Cheesecake Factory.
277
00:14:54,977 --> 00:14:57,002
- I'll show you the trick with the shower.
- Okay.
278
00:14:58,948 --> 00:15:00,415
I'm sorry?
279
00:15:00,583 --> 00:15:02,210
It's French for "good shower. "
280
00:15:02,384 --> 00:15:05,148
It's a sentiment I can express
in six languages.
281
00:15:05,921 --> 00:15:08,515
Save it for your blog, Howard.
282
00:15:15,931 --> 00:15:18,161
All right, there it goes.
It sticks, I'm sorry.
283
00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:19,995
- Okay, thanks.
- You're welcome.
284
00:15:20,169 --> 00:15:22,194
Oh, you're just gonna step right...? Okay.
285
00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:25,633
Hey, Leonard?
- The hair products are Sheldon's.
286
00:15:25,808 --> 00:15:26,968
Okay.
287
00:15:27,142 --> 00:15:31,044
- Um, can I ask you a favor?
- A favor?
288
00:15:31,213 --> 00:15:34,444
Sure, you could ask me a favor.
I would do you a favor for you.
289
00:15:35,217 --> 00:15:39,313
- It's okay if you say no.
- Oh, I'll probably say yes.
290
00:15:39,588 --> 00:15:43,649
It's just not the kind of thing
you ask a guy you just met.
291
00:15:43,826 --> 00:15:45,453
Wow.
292
00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:53,866
I really think we should examine
the chain of causality here.
293
00:15:54,036 --> 00:15:55,264
- Must we?
- Event A:
294
00:15:55,437 --> 00:15:57,496
A beautiful woman
stands naked in our shower.
295
00:15:57,673 --> 00:16:01,006
Event B: We drive halfway across town
to retrieve a television set...
296
00:16:01,176 --> 00:16:03,371
...from the aforementioned woman's
ex-boyfriend.
297
00:16:03,545 --> 00:16:07,140
Query: On what plane of existence
is there even a semi-rational link...
298
00:16:07,316 --> 00:16:09,341
...between these events?
299
00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:12,384
She asked me to do her a favor, Sheldon.
300
00:16:12,554 --> 00:16:15,022
Well, that may be the proximal cause
of our journey...
301
00:16:15,190 --> 00:16:17,624
...but we both know it exists
in contradistinction...
302
00:16:17,793 --> 00:16:19,727
...to the higher-level distal cause.
303
00:16:19,895 --> 00:16:22,728
- Which is?
- You think with your penis.
304
00:16:23,265 --> 00:16:26,393
That's a biological impossibility,
and you didn't have to come.
305
00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:29,765
Oh, yes. I could have stayed behind
to watch Wolowitz hit on Penny...
306
00:16:29,938 --> 00:16:32,270
...in Russian, Arabic and Farsi.
307
00:16:32,441 --> 00:16:34,341
And why can't she get her own TV?
308
00:16:34,510 --> 00:16:36,444
Come on, you know how it is
with breakups.
309
00:16:36,612 --> 00:16:38,910
No, I don't, and neither do you.
310
00:16:39,081 --> 00:16:41,140
But I... I broke up with Joyce Kim.
311
00:16:41,316 --> 00:16:44,774
You did not break up with Joyce Kim.
She defected to North Korea.
312
00:16:44,953 --> 00:16:47,513
To mend her broken heart.
313
00:16:50,125 --> 00:16:52,650
This situation is much less complicated.
314
00:16:52,828 --> 00:16:55,490
There's some dispute
between Penny and her ex-boyfriend...
315
00:16:55,664 --> 00:16:57,325
...as to who gets custody of the TV.
316
00:16:57,499 --> 00:17:01,230
- She just wanted to avoid a scene with him.
- So we get to have a scene with him?
317
00:17:01,403 --> 00:17:03,894
No, Sheldon,
there's not going to be a scene.
318
00:17:04,073 --> 00:17:05,734
There's two of us and one of him.
319
00:17:05,908 --> 00:17:08,934
Leonard, the two of us
can't even carry a TV.
320
00:17:10,746 --> 00:17:13,681
So you guys work with Leonard and Sheldon
at the university?
321
00:17:19,354 --> 00:17:21,788
I'm sorry, do you speak English?
322
00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:25,017
Oh, he speaks English.
He just can't speak to women.
323
00:17:25,761 --> 00:17:27,160
Really? Why?
324
00:17:27,329 --> 00:17:29,092
He's kind of a nerd.
325
00:17:31,867 --> 00:17:33,391
Juice box?
326
00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:40,474
- I'll do the talking.
Yeah?
327
00:17:40,642 --> 00:17:43,236
- Hi. I'm Leonard, this is Sheldon.
- Hello.
328
00:17:43,412 --> 00:17:44,845
What did I just...?
329
00:17:46,715 --> 00:17:49,548
- We're here to pick up Penny's TV.
- Get lost.
330
00:17:49,718 --> 00:17:51,083
Okay, thanks for your time.
331
00:17:51,253 --> 00:17:54,745
- We're not gonna give up just like that.
- Leonard, the TV's in the building.
332
00:17:54,923 --> 00:17:57,915
We've been denied access to the building,
ergo we are done.
333
00:17:58,093 --> 00:18:01,961
Excuse me. If I were to give up at the first
hitch, I never would have identified...
334
00:18:02,131 --> 00:18:06,067
...the fingerprints of string theory
in the aftermath of the big bang.
335
00:18:06,802 --> 00:18:09,032
My apologies. What's your plan?
336
00:18:23,085 --> 00:18:25,747
It's just a privilege
to watch your mind at work.
337
00:18:26,855 --> 00:18:29,323
Come on,
we have a combined IQ of 360.
338
00:18:29,491 --> 00:18:32,551
We should be able to figure out
how to get into a stupid building.
339
00:18:36,932 --> 00:18:40,026
- What do you think their combined IQ is?
- Just grab the door.
340
00:18:42,037 --> 00:18:43,902
This is it.
341
00:18:44,606 --> 00:18:45,766
I'll do the talking.
342
00:18:45,941 --> 00:18:48,637
Good thinking, I'll just be the muscle.
343
00:18:55,784 --> 00:18:58,981
- Yeah?
- I'm Leonard, this is Sheldon.
344
00:18:59,154 --> 00:19:00,951
From the intercom.
345
00:19:02,291 --> 00:19:04,725
How the hell did you get in the building?
346
00:19:05,394 --> 00:19:07,294
We're scientists.
347
00:19:09,131 --> 00:19:11,429
Tell him about our IQ.
348
00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:25,073
- Leonard.
- What?
349
00:19:25,247 --> 00:19:28,444
- My mom bought me those pants.
- I'm sorry.
350
00:19:29,084 --> 00:19:31,143
You're gonna have to call her.
351
00:19:33,655 --> 00:19:36,556
Sheldon, I am so sorry
I dragged you through this.
352
00:19:36,725 --> 00:19:40,957
It's okay. It wasn't my first pantsing
and it won't be my last.
353
00:19:41,129 --> 00:19:42,790
And you were right about my motives.
354
00:19:42,965 --> 00:19:45,729
I was hoping to establish
a relationship with Penny...
355
00:19:45,901 --> 00:19:49,132
...that might have someday led to sex.
356
00:19:49,738 --> 00:19:52,229
Well, you got me out of my pants.
357
00:19:53,642 --> 00:19:57,134
Anyway, I've learned my lesson.
She's out of my league, I'm done with her.
358
00:19:57,312 --> 00:19:58,506
I've got my work.
359
00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:01,615
One day I'll win the Nobel Prize
and then I'll die alone.
360
00:20:01,783 --> 00:20:04,843
Don't think like that.
You're not going to die alone.
361
00:20:05,020 --> 00:20:07,989
Thank you, Sheldon.
You're a good friend.
362
00:20:09,124 --> 00:20:12,025
And you're certainly
not gonna win a Nobel Prize.
363
00:20:12,561 --> 00:20:16,361
This is one of my favorite places
to kick back after a quest.
364
00:20:16,531 --> 00:20:18,328
They have a great house ale.
365
00:20:18,500 --> 00:20:19,524
Wow, cool tiger.
366
00:20:19,701 --> 00:20:22,636
Yeah, I've had him since Level 10.
367
00:20:22,905 --> 00:20:24,805
His name is Buttons.
368
00:20:25,374 --> 00:20:27,433
Anyway, if you had
your own game character...
369
00:20:27,609 --> 00:20:30,510
...we could hang out,
maybe go on a quest.
370
00:20:30,679 --> 00:20:33,978
- That sounds interesting.
- So you'll think about it?
371
00:20:34,149 --> 00:20:36,879
Oh, I don't think
I'll be able to stop thinking about it.
372
00:20:38,854 --> 00:20:40,583
Smooth.
373
00:20:42,524 --> 00:20:45,425
- We're home.
- Oh, my God. What happened?
374
00:20:45,594 --> 00:20:51,226
Well, your ex-boyfriend sends his regards
and I think the rest is fairly self-explanatory.
375
00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:52,526
I'm so sorry.
376
00:20:52,701 --> 00:20:56,159
I really thought if you guys went
instead of me he wouldn't be such an ass.
377
00:20:56,338 --> 00:20:57,930
No, it was a valid hypothesis.
378
00:20:58,106 --> 00:21:01,337
That was a valid hypo...?
What is happening to you?
379
00:21:01,877 --> 00:21:04,971
Really, thank you so much
for going and trying.
380
00:21:05,147 --> 00:21:08,674
You just... You're so terrific.
381
00:21:10,352 --> 00:21:14,049
Why don't you put some clothes on,
I'll get my purse, and dinner is on me, okay?
382
00:21:14,222 --> 00:21:15,416
- Really? Great.
- Thank you.
383
00:21:15,590 --> 00:21:16,818
Okay.
384
00:21:21,930 --> 00:21:24,330
You're not done with her, are you?
385
00:21:25,334 --> 00:21:28,428
Our babies will be smart and beautiful.
386
00:21:30,305 --> 00:21:32,739
Not to mention imaginary.
387
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:40,580
- Is Thai food okay with you, Penny?
- Sure.
388
00:21:40,749 --> 00:21:42,740
We can't have Thai,
we had Indian for lunch.
389
00:21:42,918 --> 00:21:45,352
- So?
- They're both curry-based cuisines.
390
00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,216
- So?
- It would be gastronomically redundant.
391
00:21:48,390 --> 00:21:51,826
I can see we're going to have to
spell out everything for this girl.
392
00:21:52,594 --> 00:21:54,653
Any ideas, Raj?
393
00:21:56,264 --> 00:21:58,528
Turn left on Lake Street
and head up to Colorado.
394
00:21:58,700 --> 00:22:01,328
I know a wonderful little sushi bar
that has karaoke.
395
00:22:01,503 --> 00:22:03,471
Oh, that sounds like fun.
396
00:22:15,984 --> 00:22:18,316
I don't know your odds
in the world as a whole...
397
00:22:18,487 --> 00:22:22,753
...but as far as the population of this car
goes, you're a veritable mac daddy.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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